Contemplations
by Nix-the-Neko
Summary: Joshua is waiting for Mr. H when he receives an unexpected visitor.


A sky dotted with many twinkling stars shown down upon the barren town. There were only five residents that lived there. The streets were winding and empty without any pedestrians to walk over them. Filtered light shown down from a few nearby lampposts. However, they didn't seem to do much, rather, one would get the feeling that the world was being lit up by the stars above.

Joshua stood by himself, leaning his back against the wall, pressing both of his palms to the mural behind him. The emptiness of the town was reflected by the utter silence of everything, save for the bubbling noise from the large fountain that was close by.

It was overwhelming, being so far from home. He hadn't really had time to process his own emotions, what with preserving the fragments that had once been his friends. He had ignored his feelings and thrown himself into restoring all of them. All of the people he had barely managed to save.

His eyes were closed and his head was tilted upward, pointed somewhere between the buildings and the sky. It was at times like this, times when he wanted to be alone (now that he actually could be by himself), that he was grateful that the Nightmares were not attracted to him.

He would die before he let anyone see him so vulnerable—even the Nightmares.

Joshua giggled quietly to himself. "That'd be something that you would say, huh, Sanae? I can almost hear that horrid joke. …It's as if you're standing right next to me."

Unintentionally, Joshua's hand went to his pocket and he retrieved his cell phone. He flipped it open thoughtlessly and felt a bitter disappointment when he saw that he still didn't have any new messages. He felt his heart drop in his chest, even though he hadn't expected a response anyway.

Instead, he continued talking to the mural, as if it would somehow transfer exactly what he was saying to Sanae directly.

"What _am_ I going to do without you? I do, in fact, know that I can get along without your constant assistance, but… I don't remember a time that I was truly without you. You were always there with your grin and your horrible-tasting, yet absolutely addicting coffee, and your… support."

Another sigh was drawn from Joshua's lips as he opened his eyes and looked up at the stars. Somewhere out there was an angelic barista, still obsessing over his beans.

The thought brought a bittersweet smile to Joshua's face, and he couldn't help but check his phone again.

"Still no Sanae…" Joshua murmured. "Why do I insist on checking my phone? You're not going to answer."

At first, Joshua had just assumed that Sanae would come and get them all after the Game was over. But, when he didn't, Joshua had guessed that he was busy with something in the Higher Plane—or more likely, on the run from it.

Had they caught up with his Producer? Would he return to Shibuya to find that they had hired some sort of replacement for him?

No.

Joshua wouldn't allow that.

Sanae had always been his Producer, that's how it had always been, and that's how it would always be.

"Where are you…?" Joshua said, flipping his phone closed and returning it to his pocket.

"I'm right here, man," said a familiar voice from above.

Joshua let out a startled gasp as he spun around and took a few steps back. He looked up to see Beat rubbing his eye and in the middle of a yawn.

"Where you there the whole time…?" Joshua asked, quickly raising his emotional mask back up.

"Yup," muttered Beat as he blinked down at Joshua, gripping the railing that bordered the top of the mural.

"Were you spying on me?" Joshua frowned at Beat, wondering how he'd missed his presence.

"No way. I was sleepin', yo. 'Sides, you ain't interestin' enough to spy on," Beat replied and hopped over the fence, landing next to him.

"Why were you sleeping… up there? Did you forget the way back to the hotel or something?" Joshua  
sniped. So he wasn't as alone as he'd thought. At least Beat had been asleep and hadn't heard anything else he was saying. Or, Joshua hoped that he hadn't.

"A' course not!" Beat looked shocked at the proposal. "I was fightin' some of the Dream Eaters and got tired. So I jus' sat down and took a nap."

"In the middle of the Fountain Plaza? Julius is usually around here, Beat," Joshua frowned and crossed his arms.

"Eh, whatever," Beat said, "Ain't nobody around to tell me I can't. 'Sides, we haven't seen Julius since Sora and Riku was here. I dunno what they did, but Julius hasn't shown his face since."

"Better safe than sorry, Beat. I might have to tell Rhyme about this little… _escapade_ of yours," Joshua replied.

"Bwaahh! Don't do that!" Beat shouted.

"And why shouldn't I…?" Joshua smirked, feeling a little better now that he was in control of the situation again.

Beat frowned at him. "Just… don't…!" he warned.

"Or what?" Joshua asked, dragging out the 'or' part, "Are you going to punch me? Take your frustrations out on me and then just leave me bloody and broken?"

At that, Beat's look flashed from mildly sleepy to full on hurt. He didn't say anything, just stared at the Composer.

Seeing that look on Beat's face, the one that looked like betrayal… Joshua immediately wanted to take back what he had said. But he didn't say anything either.

"The hell?!" Beat finally said—or shouted—and his expression changed to anger.

"Just stating the truth, dear," Joshua replied.

At that, Beat's eyes narrowed. "You know what? Fuck this. I don't gotta take this from you." And with that, Beat spun around and started stomping off, kicking one of the boxes that was lying nearby on his way out.

And Joshua just stood there in silence, watching Beat's retreating form. He sighed quietly to himself and leaned back against the wall, finally alone, completely and utterly alone.

Joshua stared up at the stars for a good long while, a frown seemingly fixed permanently on his face. Perhaps what he had said to Beat was unnecessary. No, of course it was, but that hadn't stopped him from saying it, now had it?

Because, in the end, Joshua was always just going to end up by himself. In a way, it was for the best. That was why he'd hadn't agreed to meet Neku back in Shibuya when he'd offered those weeks ago during that mission with the Spellican Nightmare. He was the Composer after all.

His identity was supposed to be a secret. He couldn't traipse around in the RG, especially after he had been seen by both of those Reapers of his. If they saw him alive, they would start to ask questions, questions that he couldn't answer. He was sure that Kariya would begin to suspect what he was. He was certainly intelligent enough.

Joshua closed his eyes again and took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, listening to the bubbling fountain and the eerie silence of the town that was nothing like Shibuya.

It was a half hour later when he heard footsteps approaching. Joshua looked sharply and was surprised to see Beat again. He looked a little uncertain when Joshua's eyes met his, but that uncertainty faded to determination.

"So, what is the ruffian doing back?" Joshua asked lightly; although he was giving Beat a calculating look.

"Listen, I know you waitin' for the coffee man—" Beat started.

"So you _were_ spying on me," Joshua interrupted Beat before he could say anything else.

"No, tha's what Rhyme said you was doin'. Why the hell are you mopin' around if you're waitin' for 'im?" Beat asked. "You really want Mr. H to come back an' see you actin' like Phones?"

"Acting like Neku, you say…" Joshua pondered, frowning to himself. Had he truly been acting like… oh dear, he had…

Beat stood there and watched for a few moments as Joshua mentally berated himself for actually going emo on everyone. However, after a few moments, Beat reached out and pulled Joshua into a one-armed hug.

"Forgiven already? That was… rather fast," Joshua said, bewildered by the sudden event.

"Jus' can it, you ain't foolin' nobody, y'know? Least of all me," Beat muttered and let go of Joshua quickly, looking away and scratching his head.

"Fooling you? About what?" Joshua asked.

"'Bout…" Beat trailed off, obviously trying to think about what he wanted to say, "'bout how scared you are."

"Scared…?" Joshua raised his eyebrows, taken aback by the accusation.

"Yeah. You just as lost as we are, ain'tcha? I mean, you don' even know how much longer we gonna be here. I know that I ain't smart or nothin', but I know that everyone's scared a' what's happenin'." Beat looked straight into Joshua's eyes as he said this.

"Including you…?" Joshua pointed out, attempting to redirect the spotlight onto Beat.

"'Cept me. Men like me don't get scared. I know tha' you brought us here to save us 'n shit, but… uh…" Beat frowned to himself, searching for what he was going to say again. "But nobody's 'round to save you. Tha's what's happenin'. Yeah, you the Composer 'n all, but a man's gotta know his limits… or somethin' like that."

"Beat… that doesn't…" Joshua sighed, "I know my limits, Beat."

"Good, then you should know your limits for bein' emo. Now, come on, I wanna race you through that place with all the rails to grind," Beat offered Joshua a wide grin.

"The… Post Office?" Joshua asked, raising an eyebrow again.

"Uh… yeah, that," Beat replied and nudged Joshua on the shoulder. "Come on, let's go!"

"And, if I stayed here and continued being, as you stated 'emo?'" Joshua said in an almost playful tone.

"Do that an' I'm gonna drag you outta tha' corner t' have fun, whether you want it or not."

Joshua, putting on a completely straight face, turned around and walked into the nearest corner. For added effect, he sat down and brought his knees to his chest, curling up.

Beat just stared at Joshua for a few seconds. "I'm serious, yo. Don' make me make you have fun."

"Come on and try," Joshua challenged.

"'Aight," Beat said. He walked over and picked up Joshua and tossed him over his shoulder before he started walking toward the Post Office.

"Beat! What are you doing?!" Joshua yelped in alarm, clinging to Beat's shirt.

"I said I would drag you outta it."

"You said 'drag,' not 'manhandle!'" Joshua replied, resisting every urge he had to flail like a helpless schoolgirl.

"Same thing."

"No, it's not," Joshua objected.

"You just don' wanna race me 'cause you know you gonna lose," Beat said in a challenging tone.

"Are you so sure about that…?" Joshua retorted, in an almost playful voice.

"Yup. Tha's why you don' wanna race me."

"Hmph. As you would say: bring it on."

"Dude, you all ready lost."


End file.
